One of the new temps is a plague-carrier. His nose dripped onto the keyboard earlier today. He keeps sneezing and saying to customers, “sorry about that. Where was I? I have decimal places in all the wrong places.”
I suppose I should be happy that he is making the effort.
At the other extreme, I have Simon, the Craig David looky-likey, who is off work at the drop of his hat: “It fell off my head and hit my toe sir.”