Who dares …

The sales stream is a group of self-appointed elite who have clandestine meetings in the boardroom. Fuelled by coffee and bourbon biscuits they plot future initiatives that impact on all facets of The Call Centre.

I came away from yesterday’s meeting slightly addled by the detail that they apply to everything. My days of playing fast and lose are over. Thanks to Bernard and his desire to develop me and push me out of my ‘comfort zone’ I have to suffer anal retentive like Mary: “I think “ringing” is less polite than “calling”, yet “making a call” is more accurate, but cumbersome, please can I have your thoughts?”

I had none. I grinned inanely.

As a result of the meeting I have picked up a new area of responsibility. Bernard wants to improve the ‘Adviser Communication’ and wishes to introduce an intranet forum and instant messenging.

At the head of the sales stream is Mutley (Ian) so called because he answers every question with a breathy, “Yep. Yep. Yep.”

He slithered over to me after the meeting, munching on a pink wafer biscuit, “Good to have you on board. I think you’ll add a lot to this group because I hear that you are very “grass-roots” and we need someone like you on the team.”

Mary was listening. “I wouldn’t say “grassroots”, I think “Man of the People” is more accurate.”

I love Mary. She incites violence and adoration to equal degrees, like a boxer who is into small print.