8 Oct 2003

Ash Wednesday

I often wonder why smokers have special privileges in The Call Centre. Cathy Gilroy was unhappy that they were stood outside, freezing their bollocks off, and leaving their dimps in the doorway. A port-a-cabin has been built for them to indulge in their bad habit. I wonder if she will extend the same hospitality for other bad habits: Manic Miner could have a room for delving in his nostril, or a room with an extractor for mid-day farting.

The Smoke Room is a place in which I have never ventured but I understand that this is the hotbed of rumour. The grapevine starts and ends in the smoke room.

For the first time, I am sending in a special correspondent, Fag Ash Lil, to report on the comings and goings in the port-a-cabin. Armed with a short-hand notepad, a pen and twenty bennys , Lil will send a report from the Smoke Room… beginning soon …