Big Bro. Taking over the show.

The Call Centre is impenetrable to the outside world. I like to think of it as a protective dome that war, famine and pestilence does not reach.

In my 11 year history of working here I can only think of a handful of news events that have reached me while I was working.

As a rule, all of the events involve sudden death: 9/11, Dunblane, John Smith’s heart attack when he was having a bath, and Jill Dando’s assassination as she returned home from shopping.

There is one exception. When Nasty Nick was chucked out of the first house because, gasp, horror – he wanted to win, it spread through The Call Centre like chlamydia on an 18-30’s holiday. I remember Katherine from accounts bursting into the smoke hut shouting: “They’ve turned off the cameras coz someone as been murdered!”

It would have been around the water cooler; but we haven’t got one.

Today’s Big Brother Favourite: Sissy because she looks like a hybrid of Carrie, Sonia and Mrs Overall.