17 Jun 2003


I have been in a state of numb silence since the selection event. Any self-confidence that I ever had has been knocked out of me. I have neglected the team all week and allowed myself to slip into a morose, self-pitying stupor.

The test paper, the group session, the practical ‘report writing’ exercise, and the actual interview have been playing over and over in my head for the whole week.

It seems that I am doomed to stay in the same position for the rest of my life. My friends have started to call me Parky, because I have had more interviews than Michael Parkinson.

There must be a way out. Just when I thought I couldn’t get any lower, my new mobile phone started to rattle. It was in my trouser pocket and the motion sent my leg into spasm. It was a text message from Bernard:

“Srry tht this mssg is l8tr thn xptd. Un4tnly yr un6ssfl in yr applxtn. Bernard :>””