13 Feb 2004

Fag End

The gnome with the scary eyes has come out of hiding, complete with its eye-patch, and stares at me menacingly. It was put away in case it offended the visitors and it was only today that we noticed its absence.

The team spent the day trying to complete John Doe’s list of ‘People with Eye-Patches’:

Pete Burn
Captain Pugwash
Daryl Hannah in KILL BILL

I didn’t join in. I was too busy rushing around like a blue-arsed fly trying to tie up the lose ends before I go on holiday. I don’t know why I bother. No matter how much I cover my bases and prepare contingency, I’ll still get slagged off for missing something.

I asked Fag Ash Lil if she would cover my absence from the blog with some insights from The Smoke Club.

Lil is a dedicated smoker.

She goes into the Smoke Hut AND stands with the lingerers (who leave their dimps at the doorway) to make sure that she gets every possible angle of the latest gossip.

She is presently studying at night school so she can ignore the warnings on her imported cigarettes in a different language.

She pulled her face. Her eyebrows knotted together. She carefully contemplated my suggestion, before saying, “I can’t be arsed.”

Looks like I’ll have to shut down for a week then.