Izzy wizzy Let’s Get Busy

Sooty’s back.

Call Centre Tony has named Nigel ‘Sooty’ (pronounced ‘Sutty’) because he looks like Peter Sutcliffe. The Yorkshire Ripper, on his security pass. The beard went sometime in the past, now he is a sweet, sweet, fatherly person who can not only bore a glass eye to sleep but could solve the insomnia of a bag of marbles while he was at it.

He was a manager in the Call Centre, running the office day-to-day, acting as an under-boss for Bernard, but he was so ineffective that he was put into ‘project’ limbo. Working on projects is the equivalent to a witness protection scheme; former managers and big wigs are stripped of their stripes and given a set of post-it notes and a new identity.

Nigel was originally sent away to prevent devastating effects of the Millennium bug.

(A moment’s silence please, in respect for all the people who managed to have a twelve month junket on that baby.)

Since then he has done a headset audit; developed an voice response IVR that was abandoned after a week due to customer complaints; he developed an automated telesales message that was abandoned when the legislation changed and he was sent to Iraq to search for weapons of mass destruction.

I made up the last one.

If Blair can, so can I.